Encouragement Plus Coaching

PRIORITIES AND BOUNDARIES
FOR A BALANCED LIFE

Don H. Morris
Life Coach

From The Encourager Newsletter Issue #005 November 2003

Setting priorities and boundaries is essential to achieving balance in life. Saying Yes to one goal means saying No to all other goals and pulls on your attention, even positive ones. In order to achieve your heart's desires, you must commit to a goal, and cut out anything and everything that does not contribute to reaching that goal (unless, of course, something more important takes priority over the original goal). You must choose what you want out of life, then say No to anything that hinders you in reaching your goal.

This means saying No to the demands of others. Other people want to meet their needs by having you say Yes to their goals. If this is mutually beneficial and helpful, you may choose to say Yes to another's goal. We need people in our lives for intimacy and joy.

But not all of the demands from others are helpful or healthy. You set appropriate boundaries by saying No when someone else seeks to meet their needs at your expense. Asserting yourself is your right, and a skill that you can learn.

Always say Yes to your own personal choices. When a friend or family member asks you to do something that competes with a goal you have prioritized, you may feel too guilty to tell them No. You don't have to. You can tell the other person that you have said Yes to a different goal, one you have chosen for yourself.

At times you will want to say Yes to the goals of others. Your own needs and desires must be balanced with those of the important people in your life. Let your Yes or No arise out of your own free choice, not a sense of duty or guilt.

May I suggest a priority for your life? Start setting healthy boundaries today!

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